YOU ARE VIEWING A DEMO REPORT
Success In Relationships
Introduction 00Back to Table of Contents
This report is designed to help Angela be more successful in all her relationships. The report sections cover different aspects of relationships and communication that should help Angela be more effective in communication and improve her relationships.
Quick Instructions for Angela
1) Read the report
As you read the report, note down places where it talks about the sorts of communication or relationships challenges you are facing right now.
2) Write down three important insights
Pick three items from the report that seem really important for your relationships right now. It might be something that is causing you difficulty at the moment or you might have recognized something that caused you problems in the past that you want to try to be sure won’t happen again. It could also be something that you want to share with other people to help them to understand you better.
3) Write out a plan for what you can do based on your insights
Determine what actions you can take over the next month to make use of what you’ve learned about yourself. What actions can you take to improve communication? How might you develop your relationship skills? Who can you talk to for feedback? Who can help you stay on track?
Insights into Personal Relationships 01Back to Table of Contents
Key insight and factors for interacting with others outside work and school
Insights into Personal Relationships
- I enjoy a wide circle of friends from different places with different outlooks.
- I like being with people who are optimistic.
- I never say no to a party unless I think it may be boring, I like doing things that are a bit different, without too many rules and that everyone enjoys.
In a relationship
- Key important factors are humor, authenticity, acceptance and personal growth.
- I show I care by finding as many ways as I can to show how important this friendship is.
- I like home to be a place where I feel warmth and appreciation, where I have fun and I'm free to laugh loudly.
- I want encouragement to follow my passions, to be praised for originality and my unique style is accepted and enjoyed.
Enthusiastic With Friends:
- Talkative and sociable
- Easy to get to know
- Enjoys being active and sporty
- Likes having lots of friends over
- Would rather talk than text (but texting is better than nothing!)
Imaginative With Friends:
- Accepts friendships may change
- Enjoys being the ideas person
- Likes to share new experiences
- Expect the unexpected
- Looks at things from every angle
Warm With Friends:
- Values warmth and affection
- Needs to be included in the group
- Shares feelings and emotions easily
- Knows how to be supportive
- Prefers to be tactful rather than truthful
Spontaneous With Friends:
- Enjoys “hanging out” doing “whatever”
- Reluctant to confirm plans
- Hates strict time frames and often runs late
- Enjoys being spontaneous, loves surprises
- Plays games according to whatever rules will be more fun
Original work by: Sue Blair © Step Research Corporation
Communication - Quick Overview 02Back to Table of Contents
This section is both descriptive and has developmental suggestions for communicating with those you care about.
Communication in Relationships
Communication EnergizerBrainstorming new ideas
Communication StressorPessimistic reactions that cut off discussion of what might be possible
Communication Quick TipPause if you feel you aren’t getting any feedback, what feels to you like a lack of enthusiasm may simply indicate someone needing more time to think
Original work by: Sterling Bates Gene Bellotti Katherine Hirsh Elizabeth Hirsh © Step Research Corporation
How to Talk to Me 03Back to Table of Contents
Specific tips on how to better communicate and talk with each person
How to talk to Angela:
Enthusiastic & Insightful
“Let’s do it in a different way”
Angela responds best to communication when you:
Show a personal interest
Start by asking how Angela is doing. Remember that harmony, a positive attitude and an authentic relationship between you is essential.
Present the vision
Explain how Angela fits with the vision in a meaningful way. Remember to focus on why what you are talking about is important for human growth and development. Talk about the “higher purpose”. Present options.
Present the big picture
Talk about concepts and themes and clarify correlations and context. Be associative, not sequential. Avoid too many details unless Angela requests this.
Focus on the long-term perspective
Be future-oriented. Talk about new solutions and opportunities for development of human potential – especially in the long run.
Acknowledge initiatives concerning new and different ways of doing things. Do not turn down ideas too fast. Challenge the imagination. Ask open-ended questions.
Avoid talking too much without Angela being involved. Dialogue is the most important tool for Angela. Show interest and empathy. Tone down your language.
Consider values and needs of people as important data. Allow and invite personal views and idealistic thoughts.
Give sincere compliments
Appreciate the ideas and unique role of Angela, and remember to praise contributions to the process and personality not just accomplishments.
Original work by: Mette Babitzkow Boje Tina Brøndum Kristjánsson © Step Research Corporation
Interaction Style Stress Management 04Back to Table of Contents
How you manage and develop stress based on your interaction styles.
Angela's Interaction Style
Energizer - Get-Things-Going
Angela is likely stressed by
- Not being a part of what's going on
- Feeling unliked or not accepted
When stressed, Angela is likely to
- Feel scattered and panicky
- Are overly expressive
- Use selective avoidance
How to help Angela
- Listen as they talk things out
- Encourage their active participation
- Express their own ideas, thoughts and feelings
Angela's talents when fully leveraging Energizer - Get-Things-Going include
- Make preparations
- Discover new ways of seeing things
- Share insights
- Explore options
- Catalyze and energize
- Brainstorm ideas
Original work by: Linda Berens © Step Research Corporation
Romantic Relationships 05Back to Table of Contents
This section is both descriptive and has developmental suggestions for handling romantic relationships.
- Angela typically has a focus on being cooperative and getting along with others.
- She likely makes the effort to imagine what the other person is going through and wants to talk through these feelings.
- Angela may sometimes neglect to consider how present circumstances might contrain her ability to create the future she can so clearly see.
Relationship EnergizerThinking optimistically about how the future might unfold with your partner
Relationship StressorHaving to spend too much time considering practicalities
Relationship Quick TipTake time to listen to others' cares and concerns about the difficulties that might lie ahead
Original work by: Sterling Bates Gene Bellotti Katherine Hirsh © Step Research Corporation
Building A Better Relationship 06Back to Table of Contents
Build your perfect relationship description
- Angela feels most valued and loved when admired for her creativity, accepted for her uniqueness, and seen as the compassionate person she is
- She likes and needs to hear her partner tell her how much she means to them and then do thoughtful, spontaneous things to demonstrate it
- Angela wants to be appreciated for her great ideas, unusual perceptiveness, and ability to understand and communicate with people
- She feels most appreciated when her partner encourages her strong need for lots of social contact and supports her desire to respond to life spontaneously
- Angela wants to be appreciated for the thoughtfulness and compassion she shows to others
- She needs her partner to make a real effort to get to know her and to understand her often spiritual or philosophical nature
- Above all, she needs to be able to express her feelings and have them taken seriously, and she needs to be told how much her partner appreciates the many big and little things she does to make her mate happy
- Angela feels most appreciated and loved when her partner is patient and supportive and listens carefully
- She needs to be understood and wants a partner who is sensitive to her feelings and respectful of her values
- She also likes to be reassured, often verbally, about how much she is loved
Original work by: Paul D. Tieger © Step Research Corporation