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Angela Person

Success In Relationships

Self-Aware Student

Introduction 00

This report is designed to help Angela be more successful in all her relationships.  The report sections cover different aspects of relationships and communication that should help Angela be more effective in communication and improve her relationships.  

 

Quick Instructions for Angela

1) Read the report

As you read the report, note down places where it talks about the sorts of communication or relationships challenges you are facing right now.

2) Write down three important insights

Pick three items from the report that seem really important for your relationships right now.  It might be something that is causing you difficulty at the moment or you might have recognized something that caused you problems in the past that you want to try to be sure won’t happen again. It could also be something that you want to share with other people to help them to understand you better. 

3) Write out a plan for what you can do based on your insights 

Determine what actions you can take over the next month to make use of what you’ve learned about yourself.  What actions can you take to improve communication?  How might you develop your relationship skills?  Who can you talk to for feedback?  Who can help you stay on track? 

Insights into Personal Relationships 01

Key insight and factors for interacting with others outside work and school

Insights into Personal Relationships

With friends

  • I enjoy a wide circle of friends from different places with different outlooks.
  • I like being with people who are optimistic.
  • I never say no to a party unless I think it may be boring, I like doing things that are a bit different, without too many rules and that everyone enjoys.

In a relationship

  • Key important factors are humor, authenticity, acceptance and personal growth.
  • I show I care by finding as many ways as I can to show how important this friendship is.

At home

  • I like home to be a place where I feel warmth and appreciation, where I have fun and I'm free to laugh loudly.
  • I want encouragement to follow my passions, to be praised for originality and my unique style is accepted and enjoyed.

Enthusiastic With Friends:

  • Talkative and sociable
  • Easy to get to know
  • Enjoys being active and sporty
  • Likes having lots of friends over
  • Would rather talk than text (but texting is better than nothing!)

Imaginative With Friends:

  • Accepts friendships may change
  • Enjoys being on the ideas person
  • Likes to share new experiences
  • Expect the unexpected
  • Looks at things from every angle

Warm With Friends:

  • Values warmth and affection
  • Needs to be included in the group
  • Shares feelings and emotions easily
  • Knows how to be supportive
  • Prefers to be tactful rather than truthful

Spontaneous With Friends:

  • Enjoys “hanging out” doing “whatever”
  • Reluctant to confirm plans
  • Hates strict time frames and often runs late
  • Enjoys being spontaneous, loves surprises
  • Plays games according to whatever rules will be more fun
Insights into Personal Relationships Authors
Original work by: Sue Blair © Step Research Corporation

Communication In Relationships 02

This section is both descriptive and has developmental suggestions for communicating with those you care about.

Communication in Relationships

Angela loves any conversation in which she can explore new ideas. Her powerful imagination and excitement for new ideas can sometime be overwhelming to people of other types.

Communication Energizer

Brainstorming new ideas

Communication Stressor

Harsh criticism, especially criticism of new ideas

Communication Quick Tip

Bring down the energy when talking with others who don't share your type
Communication In Relationships Authors
Original work by: Sterling Bates Gene Bellotti Katherine Hirsh © Step Research Corporation

How to Talk to Me 03

Specific tips on how to better communicate and talk with each person

ACTIVITY

  1. Go through the items in the Print This Handout area below and use Polish to highlight items that are critical when communicating with you
  2. Use strikethrough on items that are not important or not true for you
  3. Many people find that when communication is breaking down or it is frustrating, it is because one of the guidelines below is being missed
  4. You can add this Report chapter to your Profile to share it with others
  5. You can also use the Print This Handout button and your browser to save it as a PDF or print just this area. If you do that make sure that you adjust your printing settings to show "background images" so that the Polish entries show up.

How to talk to Angela:

Enthusiastic & Insightful

“Let’s do it in a different way”

Motivating Words

  • Create
  • discover
  • reform
  • imagine

Angela responds best to communication when you:

  • Show a personal interest

    Start by asking how Angela is doing. Remember that harmony, a positive attitude and an authentic relationship between you is essential.

  • Present the vision

    Explain how Angela fits with the vision in a meaningful way. Remember to focus on why what you are talking about is important for human growth and development. Talk about the “higher purpose”. Present options.

  • Present the big picture

    Talk about concepts and themes and clarify correlations and context. Be associative, not sequential. Avoid too many details unless Angela requests this.

  • Focus on the long-term perspective

    Be future-oriented. Talk about new solutions and opportunities for development of human potential – especially in the long run.

  • Be open

    Acknowledge initiatives concerning new and different ways of doing things. Do not turn down ideas too fast. Challenge the imagination. Ask open-ended questions.

  • Make conversation

    Avoid talking too much without Angela being involved. Dialogue is the most important tool for Angela. Show interest and empathy. Tone down your language.

  • Incorporate values

    Consider values and needs of people as important data. Allow and invite personal views and idealistic thoughts.

  • Give sincere compliments

    Appreciate the ideas and unique role of Angela, and remember to praise contributions to the process and personality not just accomplishments.

How to Talk to Me Authors
Original work by: Mette Babitzkow Boje Tina Brøndum Kristjánsson © Step Research Corporation

Interaction Style Stress Management 04

How you manage and develop stress based on your interaction styles.

How do you tend to express yourself? How are you driven to interact with others? What is your natural energy and movement pattern? Your core Interaction Styles is the most easily observed aspect of your CORE since it is embodied in your communications and movements. The Berens Interaction Styles lens helps us establish rapport and greatly affects relationships of all kinds. Berens Interaction Styles is reflective of the long researched work on temperament in children as well as a deconstruction and reintegration of Social Styles and DiSC models.

Angela's Interaction Style

Get-Things-Going

Get-Things-Going
Urgent need to involve
"It's worth the energy to involve everyone and get them to want to..."

Angela is likely stressed by

  • Not being a part of what's going on
  • Feeling unliked or not accepted

When stressed, Angela is likely to

  • Feel scattered and panicky
  • Are overly expressive
  • Use selective avoidance

How to help Angela

  • Listen as they talk things out
  • Encourage their active participation
  • Express their own ideas, thoughts and feelings

Angela's talents when fully leveraging Get-Things-Going include

  • Make preparations
  • Discover new ways of seeing things
  • Share insights
  • Explore options
  • Facilitate
  • Catalyze and energize
  • Brainstorm ideas
  • Persuade
Interaction Style Stress Management Authors
Original work by: Linda Berens © Step Research Corporation

Romantic Relationships 05

This section is both descriptive and has developmental suggestions for handling romantic relationships.

Romantic Relationships

  • Angela has a focus on being cooperative and getting along with others.
  • She feels for others because she can imagine very well what the other person is going through.
  • Angela can sometimes expect too much from her partner.

Relationship Energizer

Thinking about possible futures with their partner

Relationship Stressor

Having to spend too much time on unimportant details

Relationship Quick Tip

Take breaks to give your partner time to talk
Romantic Relationships Authors
Original work by: Sterling Bates Gene Bellotti Katherine Hirsh © Step Research Corporation

Building A Better Relationship 06

Build your perfect relationship description

ACTIVITY

  1. You can go through the list of relationship statements below and use Polish to highlight the relationship statements that matter most to you. The goal is to have a great list of your core relationship descriptions.
  2. If there are any statements that are not as good a fit, use Polish to do a strikethrough
  3. This is about helping you carefully communicate what it is you need in a romantic relationship.
  4. This can become an opportunity to have a discussion with others about having your needs met.
  5. We encourage you to do this with your partner where each of you can share what you need.
  • Angela feels most valued and loved when admired for her creativity, accepted for her uniqueness, and seen as the compassionate person she is
  • She likes and needs to hear her partner tell her how much she means to them and then do thoughtful, spontaneous things to demonstrate it
  • Angela wants to be appreciated for her great ideas, unusual perceptiveness, and ability to understand and communicate with people
  • She feels most appreciated when her partner encourages her strong need for lots of social contact and support her desire to respond to life spontaneously
  • Angela wants to be appreciated for the thoughtfulness and compassion she shows to others
  • She needs her partner to make a real effort to get to know her and to understand her often spiritual or philosophical nature
  • Above all, she needs to be able to express her feelings and have them taken seriously, and she needs to be told how much her partner appreciates the many big and little things she does to make her mate happy
  • Angela feels most appreciated and loved when her partner is patient and supportive and listens carefully
  • She needs to be understood and wants a partner who is sensitive to her feelings and respectful of her values
  • She also likes to be reassured, often verbally, about how much she is loved
Building A Better Relationship Authors
Original work by: Paul D. Tieger © Step Research Corporation